Counseling went well. I learned the reason schizoaffective people often have trouble expressing and listening in general. When I wrote the thing about "the abyss" my honest intent was to express to people that I no longer will have a suicidal thought because I am prioritizing making sure it does not happen ever again, I surely do hope. I am deeply sorry I cause drama for you. I am still learning. It is so important to me that you care, but I don't act to get the reaction just to see others caring. In fact it really upsets me to upset others by accidental miswording.

In Light, Maggie Hess